work Archives
Murder she wrote.
Posted on May 7, 2008 10:39 PM
Let's start off this blog thing with a disturbing story. Whilst running the lovely lottery machine (I can be very sarcastic), a customer informs me of how he noticed that I just recently washed my car. The End.
The horror to this story is that I've never seen this customer before nor enough times to even remember his face... and he knows what car I drive and if & when I wash it? To have a manager and, or a male employee escort me to my car in the flippin' daylight just topped the list of "Reasons to quit." (Not to mention that, that list is already flooding with reasons to quit, this may have just pushed the list to "Reasons to fear for my life!")
'Tis a shame that I just started blogging again and I have the possibility of being murdered by some psycho-lottery-car-stalking man. Though, may I say it's a bit psycho of myself to be the slightest bit flattered... I have the inner-workings of becoming a complete psycho myself and that my friend I've come to terms with.
Other than that, this entry is the first of many horrifying, disturbing, work-bashing entries yet to come. Because I have no life, I therefor bash my job, bash my boyfriend Dave, and or bash myself for having no life. Enjoy.
P.S. May I point out I've reversed the whole cliche blog design. Everything you will ever need is below my entries. Oh yes I did because I'm a loser like that.
P.P.S. To use the word "flattered" in such a sense of "stalkery" is just unheard of. Let's just strip me down and throw me in a pit of rapists/murderers, yeah?!
Think outside of the box.
Posted on May 10, 2008 10:26 PM
A.) I miss my digital camera horribly.
B.) I'm left with taking priceless photos with a mere cell phone that has absolutely no quality (but impressive for a cell phone).
C.) I'm not quite grasping what my co-workers are trying to tell me.
This greeted me in the office (aka "The box") today. I guess this is my co-workers' subtle way of telling me that Dave and I should be "engaged" or married by now. Little do they know, I'm the one left with staring at such a message and not Dave. Such an "insinuation" should be bored into Dave's head and not mine. For am I am the hopelessly in-love female with such dreams of an engagement ring with firm beliefs that one can be engaged for an extended period of time. Not Dave, his skull is thick and filled with tight-wad ways.
AND...
As the night progressed, as well as my boredom, I decided to explain the rest of the ramblings noted on the calendar. To cut the clutter, the 3rd notes Jacob's (co-worker's son) first birthday, the 11th notes a fellow employee, Monica's, birthday, and the rest I have no care for.
Surely note the Million Dollar Raffle that started on the 1rst, otherwise known as hell on Earth. It's sure to cause an uproar amongst the addicted gamblers who strongly believe that I have the power and means to pick the million dollar ticket and sell it specifically to them. Silly me, I must have missed the "PUSH HERE FOR THE MILLION DOLLAR TICKET" button that peculiarly lies right next to the "QUICK PICK" button. Then again, it could have already been pressed by another employee and then vanished into thin air!
Much amusement is provided for me at work, whether it be calendar markings or customer's intellect, a day never goes wasted.
Catchmaster should add a cockroach to their logo
Posted on May 25, 2008 3:12 PM
This greeted me in the office today.
What I assume to be a cockroach or a water bug of some sort, dead on a mouse glue trap. A trap that was ever so designated for Mickey, whom actually made his way underneath the floorboards where his dead carcass is still decomposing to this day. I would rather have seen Mickey on this trap to spare myself and the other office workers the unearthly stench that lingers in your nostrils even when you go home. Not only that, but the fact that critters of such nature roam around in the office is disturbing. Mice are one thing, but BUGS?! I just hung our Health Department thingy for the year... ironic.
I predict that this glue trap[slash]cockroach-catcher will stay as is for months to come. I, for one, am not touching it. The amoebas are infected. I am also planning on always carrying my digital camera with me, so I'm not forced to put crappy cell phone pictures on blog.
Kindergarten education down the toilet
Posted on June 10, 2008 9:18 PM
I feel guilty for my brilliant excuse that got me out of a situation that I unknowingly put myself in because I know not how to think before I speak.
Lets just say it involved me being due back to work at 7:00 PM (I had already put in my 8 hours this morning). Even though my school loans beckon, I'm two weeks behind on my insurance, and I have yet two bills that go unpaid, the will power to pick up extra hours is still nonexistent. In the words of Rachelskirts (BTW, I had the hugest inkling to write @Rachelskirts, I damn Twitter and all its tweeting ways) - epic fail!
P.S. Would anyone happen to have $500 just lying around? Because I desperately need it.
The only advice ITT could give me was to postpone my loan consolidation to July 1rst, because the rates will be dropping to 3.9%. Hard to resist, right? My only issue is gathering up the money to pay this month's loans... which is at full rate. A whopping $182 for my Stafford loan and $273 for my private loan.
Op·por·tune
Posted on June 12, 2008 11:11 PM
The simple fact that I got a sufficient amount of sleep last night does not please me when I had to work a closing shift today. On top of that, the whole neighborhood must have held some sort of rally to gather a crowd and come shopping 15 minutes before the store closes. Heehaw! No really, there were more customer's waiting in line than there were the whole day. I kid you not; there's nothing better to do than to count customers and do puzzle books. That's how productive I am.
On a brighter note, news on my father's (God rest his soul) truck being sold. This could not have come at a more opportune time.
op·por·tune
1. appropriate, favorable, or suitable
2. occurring or coming at an appropriate time
As of today, I had roughly a week to pull $500 out of my ass for my school loans. What's even better is that I'll have $250 left over to roll around in. That's right, $250 is worth rubbing my body all over it!
Paraskavedekatriaphobia
Posted on June 13, 2008 3:19 PM
Friday the 13th, known to 99% of the Earth's population as a day of bad luck. A day of [insert air quotes] "un-coincidental" events that throw people into a spiral of paranoia that prevent them from doing their everyday routine and locking themselves in a padded room. A day where spirits, ghosts, and ghouls roam the Earth so freely, tormenting the living. Did I miss anything? No? Good.
Anywho...
The number thirteen and Friday have both been dubbed bad luck, so putting the two together is naturally, a double whammy. We all know there is an ungodly list of reasons as to why 13 is "unlucky," and Friday has been doomed unlucky because it is said Jesus was crucified on a Friday. The End. In my opinion, Friday the 13th is not a day of bad luck, but a highly glorified superstition. In all actuality (well my reality), Friday the 13th gives people the excuse to be the most neurotic, insanely psychotic, asshole, sons-of-bitches ever.
Hera are just a few, minor examples of the "characters" I've seen today:
1. Those dressed completely in chains and a fishnet body suit. (Managing to cover the wee-wee and the ta-ta's)
2. Those who are obviously obese, thinking they are 100lbs, wearing see-through outfits that show off back-cleavage.
3. Those that honestly believe it is my fault that we ran out of Wave menthol 100 cigarettes and threatened to sue...
4. Those carrying around manikin heads and moving them along to the beat of his stereo that is duct taped around his waist.
I have the right to motion a change for the definition of Friday the 13th. Instead it being a day of bad luck, it should be a day where people's IQ drop at least half of what it normally is.
P.S.
paraskavedekatriaphobia
The fear of Friday the 13th.
Derived from the concatenation of the Greek words Paraskeví (meaning Friday), and dekatreís (meaning thirteen), attached to phobía (meaning fear).
Impulse bloggin'
Posted on August 9, 2008 9:00 PM
The day after 08/08/08 and people are still playing any and all combinations of such on the lottery... I don't get it, it's not going to make the odds any brighter. I can only imagine the mass hysteria when 06/06/06 rolled around. People and their superstitions make me giggle.
Its obviously apparent that when trying to make something that's rather drag sound interesting, I still fail. A day in the life of retail: Welcome to lottery! Oh joy, the excitement tickles me.
Moving on, lets make a note that this is the second Saturday in a row where I've sat in this very chair, in this very robe... all I did this time was add some alcohol to the mix. BAM! My night just got interesting.
Hooray for pirating music.
Employee of the minute
Posted on November 7, 2008 1:37 AM
I unwillingly decided to go out with a bang. By saying that, I surprisingly got my vacation from work next week. By saying "surprisingly," I did not ask for my vacation, it just 'appeared' on next week's schedule. And then I had this fleeting thought like, "Damn! do I look that haggerd-ish to be given a vacation. Are the bags under my eyes that threatening? Are they screaming for some rest?!" D'oh! Silly me, I did request for a vacation. I requested for a vacation this week but opted to work because of all the unavailability from the rest of the employees. Then offered a simple solution to just take my vacation for next week. It all makes sense now.
Now, going back to the whole "going out with a bang" thing. I purposely left Dave's house early tonight so I can get a sufficient amount of sleep so I'm not too horrid tomorrow morning and a slight resemblance of a morning person. But here I am, wide awake at 1:40 in the morning. My goal is to get as less sleep as possible, so I'm horribly grumpy in the morning and purposely taking out all my regret for staying up late on my customers just because it's my last day of work.
Hoo-rah!
Tuna packs: Fine cuisine.
Posted on November 12, 2008 1:14 PM
Since I am home on vacation, I can have an actual lunch, and not some flavor tuna pack that I practically live off of at work.
Tuna packs are pretty much the only thing you can eat where I work and not worry about getting some parasite, or other stomach-eating-diseases. Now, since we do not have a microwave (and the computer in the office only gets so hot with the capability of only defrosting/"softening" the Bagel-To-Go's) and our deli service only serves old, rotten lunch meat that has hit the floor of at least a minimal of two times; tuna is the only healthy, safe-to-the-stomach option we employees have.
That being said, I prepared myself a hefty lunch. That being a salami and swiss sandwich drizzled in vinegar and sprinkled with black pepper. A side of baby carrots and light veggie dip. And to wash it all down, a glass of iced tea. I feel satisfied.
